everyone else.. ok mainly the girls, is preparing for their examinations now.. and what am I doing? mind-rotting away in this mind-numbing environment.
oh gosh, what is happening to me? What has happened to my zeal and my zest? They seemed to have evaporated over time, until I am now a lifeless wreck surviving on a mindless routine of eat, sleep, play facebook, sleep, eat, play facebook, sleep, eat (and fretting over worthless virtual eggs or monster invasions) ...
I know. I have plans. But I lack the current motivation to do them. Just can't summon enough .. (whatever it is.. but it is not courage or strength) to make me do work. Ok I should not even be blogging this, it just shows what an idiot I am - I know my problem but am trying to solve it by ranting.

Anyway, throughout the day, my mind if not sleeping was thinking about a couple of things...
I came up with this hypothesis/theory/analogy that friendship can be illustrated by the relationship between the sea and the sand. The more compact the sand is, the stronger the friendship. When you keep communicating with ur friends, it is akin to calling for more and more waves to wash up against the shore. And the more waves are called up, the more compact the sand is, as the waves will wash up more sand from below. Over time, the water that soak in the shore will keep the sand together, and make it more compact. And once your sand in the shore is compact, it is unlikely it will break up easily. But the thing is, making it compact requires years of consistent washing up of the waves. If you decide to have some intermittent periods of inactivity, the sand would quickly dry up and cake and break up easily. And when you try to restart or rejolt or rejuvenate the relationship, by calling waves in again, the broken up sand would instead get washed away by the waves into the bowels of the ocean. That's the problem.
I don't know if you have felt this way before, but at least it is for me. (At least I felt this way when I was ruminating about myself and my life) And this should explain some of my actions these few days...