side track start
The new blogger interface is intuitive, clean, spruced up and modern. I like!
From now on I shall label my new posts - seems like a good way to classify your posts.
And I shall make a new blog picture ONCE I get my new laptop.
side track end
It seems like the best time to blog is normally at night, when everything is quietened down. Life suddenly slows and stops. Silence and peace takes over the carnage and chaos erupting from everyday activity - both mind and body.
I have many many many thoughts lately. I take it as a form of self-actualisation and self-awareness of the many decisions that I make. Many were worth blogging about, putting down into words (and hoping some people read it and understand me better) my thoughts could help me digest and comprehend my actions better. But usually by the night fall I am either too tired or too sleepy to continue.
But I just feel like penning down why I picked up guitar.
Of all the things I should be doing in whatever little left of my spare time, I picked up guitar. Currently having a spoiled guitar and trying to get a decent replacement for a decent price. My father tried to fix the spoiled guitar but the sound just wasn't right. So this means I have to keep searching - and guitar shops have the uncanny ability of not opening when I am free!
2 main reasons why I chose guitar over prepping myself for university:
1) I want to challenge myself.
2) I want to perform/act.
1) I have been in a string of vicissitudes lately and in some ways it is affecting my self-esteem. No I won't get depressed or stuff like that, but I just want to challenge myself. I want to feel the passion of learning something new - somewhat to prepare myself for university? The challenge of picking up a seemingly impossible task (double degree with good social records) since I have literally 0 music background is something that I have yet to undertake (other than obtaining my driving license) for quite a while. My pursuit for a scholarship has lead me to many failed attempts, but it seemed the fire is burning up. I want to feel what it is like to reignite that fire again. I want to feel the fun of learning something new - at least non-academically.
2) I realise I am someone who likes to be in attention and limelight - and I lack any skills for it. I came across these 2 statements - "When you pray to god, does God give you the thing directly or does God give you the opportunity to get it?" and "Good people grab any golden opportunity that goes past, but the best will create the golden opportunity themselves". Not that I believe in God, but the idea's there.
Playing the guitar would be something that can come in handy should there need for any performances or similiar. Furthermore, I personally like to "sing" (I know I am tone deaf) and hence a guitar would be good for my own personal solo gig with me as the sole audience.
About liking being in the limelight, I am sure everyone likes to be liked. But I always feel as if I am left out, and hence have to do something about it. Sometimes I really wonder how some people have that extra edge in garnering "good" attention and the approval of others. Not that the guitar will somehow get me the attention I seek, but rather it will boost my confidence?
I know many people say that we will outgrow the guitar. But as what weisin says, "There is no long term if there is no short term"; I need something to do in the meantime rather than do "nothing" because it is not related to university. Currently learning to play the guitar is giving me immense satisfaction and I shall continue channeling whatever energy I have into this.
was re-reading my april 19 and june 9 posts... they still strike a chord in me.
