not meant for me

maybe it just wasn't meant for me
even though how much I feel in tune with it, someone else felt that I wasn't up to the cut
I shall take this as an indication of my possibly inept interviewing skills, or the fact that I am not suited for Medicine

just like what weisin questioned, "I am surprised you weren't so devastated. Your entire life has been working towards it, no?"
I feel that my reactions are usually muted. That's my trait I think, I don't really tend to show my emotions of disappointment and anger, maybe some form of happiness I will light up like the sun but when it comes to the negatives I will show a poker face - even those grateful and deep form of happiness, especially when you know someone has put in so much effort for your sake.
Yes I am indeed very disappointed, I just felt so damned certain I could get in, I could feel that passion inside me burning.

Or maybe I aren't that passionate after all? Look what I have done and compare with the rest, anything to do with medicine? But then again, does that mean I am any significantly less passionate than those who do so?

anyway, this means the path has been blocked to me.
so as human beings, we need to find an alternative path then.